Tag Archives: Republican primary

Lee Atwater: Romney can’t win in November 2012

Master political tactician Lee Atwater once said that “anyone who gets more than a 35-percent negative factor can’t win an election.”

In the 2012 Republican presidential contest, Mitt Romney is that person.

According to a new NBC News/Wall Street Journal poll, 39 percent of adults in America view Romney very or somewhat negatively, compared to 28 percent who view the former Massachusetts governor very or somewhat positively.

“If his negatives are 35 percent and his positives aren’t at least 5 percent higher,” Atwater believed, “it’s politically fatal1.”

Far from a polling fluke, the NBC/WSJ survey has remained fairly consistent over the past six months. In fact, the only significant difference between this year’s results and the same poll’s findings in 2008 is that Romney is disliked more now, as the frontrunner and presumed nominee, than he was in ’08 as a third-place finisher in the GOP primary.

In January, 2008, Romney earned a 28 percent positive review from poll respondents—the exact same positivity rating recorded in this month’s poll. His negative responses, however, have jumped 7 percentage points since 2008, from 32 percent to 39 percent.

The question is, will Atwater’s axiom hold true? Is Romney’s political fate doomed?

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So That Happened: Another GOP Debate Chirpstory

I can’t take it anymore.

It was an all-out war on the Browns™, the Uterati™, reality, and my soul:

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Mitt Romney Spin: Low Nevada Voter Turn-Out A Result of Secret Romney Fans…

…or something

With only 33,000 voters showing up for the Nevada caucus (that’s 11,000 less than in 2008), Mittens’ campaign is trying to spin voter apathy into staunch voter support.  You see, people didn’t show up to vote because they just love them some Mitt Romney.

Yeah right. From Think Progress:

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Newt Gingrich Wants a Florida Primary Do-Over

It is to laugh.

 The Republican primary is a clown show, and Newt Gingrich is about to put on his red nose and floppy shoes and do a little dance.

The Gingrich campaign plans to challenge the results of the Florida primary on the grounds that the RNC’s rules state that no “winner-take-all” primaries (like Florida’s) may be held prior to April 1, 2012.

Seriously.

From Fox News:

The Newt Gingrich campaign is gearing up to challenge the results of the Florida Republican presidential primary based on the Republican National Committee’s own rules which state that no contest can be winner-take-all prior to April 1, 2012. (See RNC memo.)

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Gingrich Supporter Rick Tyler: Democrats Abort Black Babies [updated]

Madness.

Gingrich campaign strategist Rick Tyler opened his mouth last night and a whole lotta stupid fell out. The below clip demonstrates that Republicans really do live in an alternate reality where up is down, the sky is green, and asking a question about racism ipso facto makes you racist.

It’s surreal:

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

As karoli over at Crooks & Liars put it:

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Has-been Cheater Endorses Has-been Cheater for President

The one black Republican of 2011 to somehow dodge the “uppity n!ggger” charge by patriotic, Constitution-loving Teabaggers has “officially and enthusiastically” endorsed fellow philanderer Newt Gingrich for the presidency.

Herman Cain’s nod to Gingrich, announced in West Palm Beach, Fla., just days before the Sunshine State’s primary, could swing the momentum back toward the former House speaker, as it may effect the large swath of matrimonially disinclined conservative voters who remain unimpressed with Mitt Romney’s 42-year fidelity.

Speaking candidly about his experience with unsheathed beef whistles, Cain had this to say about Gingrich:

I know that Speaker Gingrich is running for president and going through this sausage grinder—I know what this sausage grinder is all about. I know he is going through this sausage grinder because he cares about the future of the United States of America.

Between his excessive reiterations about the “sausage grinder,” Cain managed to utter at least one coherent remark, which lambasted that dirty world of “politics” for creating the inhumane and unrealistic expectation that future leaders of the free world keep their dicks in their pants.

“What does something that happened 20 years ago relative to an ex-wife have to do with fixing America’s problems today?” he asked. “Nothing.”

Whatever.

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Republicans Play the Hispanic Name Game

Forget “Jeopardy,” “Deal or No Deal,” and “Wheel of Fortune.” 

Romney wins Hispanic naming game

The next big thing in game shows is “How Many Hispanics Can You Name?”

If you spent your Thursday evening watching “X Factor” or “Vampire Diaries” instead of killing innocent brain cells by screaming at the Republican presidential primary candidates debating in Jacksonville, Fla., Nielson ranks your evening productivity at 85 percent above the 5.4 million who wasted two perfectly good hours being reminded why they’re voting a straight Democratic ticket in November.

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Mitt the ‘Milquetoast Massachusetts Moderate’ May Not Be Nominee Material

For those who want a quick and easy re-election for Barack Obama, the ideal outcome of the Republican primary race is to see the president’s supposedly most formidable rival, Mitt Romney, suffer a slow and painful (and scandalized and mortifying) defeat at the pudgy hands of the GOP’s “pneumatically overstuffed” chief narcissist, Newt Gingrich.

#romneystumpspeechfail

And don’t act like you haven’t pictured it: Newt on stage at the GOP convention in Tampa Bay, swiveling his tractor-tire hips as only a fat man can as “Dancing Queen” blares over the loud speaker; his wife, Jackie Battley Marianne Ginther Callista Gingrich standing next to him, the skin on her face stretched back and tucked neatly under her bullet-proof platinum blonde helmet, eyes aglow like polished silver dollars placed over the shrunken sockets of a corpse bride, bleached teeth clenched around an invisible key to her husband’s glitchy chastity belt loving heart in a smile that only the editors of Cosmetic Surgery Magazine could say with a straight face was “natural.”

Hanging behind the podium, a red, white, and blue banner spells out the core of this estranged congressman’s presidential platform—“Big Ideas, Child Slavery, No Blacks”—as Gingrich humbly accepts the Republican Party’s 2012 presidential nomination, his supporters cheering like drunk pedophiles at a “Little Miss Sunshine” pageant.

Is it that impossible a scenario?

If you look at each candidate’s pros and cons, it’s more than possible.

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Live-Tweeting the #CNNDebate because… ::shrug::

I don’t know anymore. There’s a debate every other hour. I can only take so much.



(chirpstory after the jump)

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