Category Archives: Tales and Tirades

I have a shouty potty mouth.

Geraldo Rivera: If #TrayvonMartin Wasn’t Wearing a Hoodie, He Would Be Alive [updated]

People don’t kill people; hoodies kill people.

 Well, this is a new twist on victim blaming.  Usually we’re busy telling women not to wear such short skirts, or not to get too drunk lest they get raped.  Now, apparently, we’re telling black and Latino youth not to wear hooded sweatshirts because it might-could get you shot in the chest by some lunatic vigilante who has a problem with those “assholes” who “always get away”:

GERALDO RIVERA: Well, I have a different take, Brian, on that. I believe that George Zimmerman, the overzealous neighborhood watch captain should be investigated to the fullest extent of the law and if he is criminally liable, he should be prosecuted. But I am urging the parents of black and Latino youngsters particularly to not let their children go out wearing hoodies. I think the hoodie is as much responsible for Trayvon Martin’s death as George Zimmerman was.

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Abercrombie & Fitch and the ‘Ni-CLANG! Brown’ Pants Affair

A&F found itself in a bit of hot water today after The Internet found out that it was selling “nigger brown” pants in the UK.  Except they weren’t really, so you can uncream your Twinkie.  (I need to point out that A&F still sucks for trying to turn teenage girls into sex objects.)

I actually laughed when I clicked through to the fake Abercrombie website advertising “nigger brown” cargo pants. Maybe I’ve just hit my fuckery limit this week or something.  I think I’m in some kind of waking coma.

In any event, turns out that Abercrombie doesn’t have control over the website selling ni-CLANG! brown pants, which is being run by some Chinese cats who really need to update their translator software:

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What is white privilege.

When my husband and I came to Chicago from Israel so that I could go to graduate school, we had no intention of staying here permanently.

But then the second Palestinian intifada happened, and the Israeli government’s entirely irresponsible and deadly response to same, and we came to a conclusion: We no longer wanted to raise children in Israel.

At the time, we only had the one child, a round-cheeked toddler boy, but the fact of his boy-ness sharpened the point. Our choice came mostly out of a desire to educate him differently, to not sacrifice his up-bringing and our values on the altar of occupation and settlement, but there was an unavoidable sense of having also snatched our son from the jaws of war — because in Israel, of course, every 18 year old boy is drafted into the military. Girls go, too, but they don’t see combat. They don’t die.

I bring this up now because I’ve been thinking a lot about all the parents of African American boys who are holding their sons a little closer today in the wake of the horrible, heartbreaking Trayvon Martin case.

My aunt is one of those moms — white as me, but mom to a black man who was once young, a young black man who was stopped for jogging in his own neighborhood, a young black man for whom she would tremble a little whenever he went into the city.

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Cathy McMorris-Rodgers Thinks Democrats Are Scaring Women

Oh, fuck this:

 

This woman is out of her fucking skull.  How DARE she? Democrats are scaring women to drum up votes?  Is she serious?  Let’s take a little walk down GOP Fuckery Lane, shall we?

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Breitbart Minion Grills Bono Impersonator; LOLZ Ensue

Zombie Breitbart must be rolling over in his grave.

Breitbart minion Jason Mattera thought he’d scored a great interview with U2′s Bono. Mattera ambushed “Bono” at some event in order to grill “Bono” (an Irish citizen) about why “Bono” is hiding tax money in Holland… or something:

U2 singer Bono is known for his antipoverty activism, which includes calls on most world governments to spend more on foreign aid. Yet when it comes to the finances of Bono’s own company, he’s apparently a bit more of a Scrooge. Moreover, he’s loath to admit it, as an interview with author Jason Mattera caught on tape showed. You can watch the video and read the transcript of some select excerpts provided by Breitbart.com below…

Except the Bono he interviewed wasn’t the Bono. It was an impersonator. Not only that, it’s an obvious impersonator! The video has been set to private on YouTube, but you can view it here because the Internet is forever:

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Persecution Not-So-Complex

Because GOP crazy has additional crazy on it at no extra charge.

The occurrence of a black man in the White House has caused a number of Republicans to suffer serious mental health issues, most notably Obama Derangement Syndrome, characterized by a complete split with actual reality and subsequent assignation of everything on Earth being the direct fault of Barack Obama.  To whit, one GOP Rep. Cliff Stearns of Florida.

Rep. Cliff Stearns (R-Fla.), a top member of the House Energy and Commerce Committee, on Tuesday said he’s not yet convinced that President Obama’s birth certificate is legitimate.

I am, shall we say, looking at all the evidence,” Stearns told reporters in the Capitol Tuesday, comments that come after he expressed similar doubts at a meeting with constituents in February.

Why, what fresh hell do I see before me here?  Birtherism!  That right, one of the bigwigs on the Energy and Commerce who is expected to discharge with all due sobriety and solemnity his duties as a member of Congress is clearly so absolutely insane that he should be removed from office just on the fact he can’t read a goddamn birth certificate.  It gets worse though.

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Helping anti-choice terrorists, one name at a time.

Last week, I got all caught up in my anti-War on Women fury and tweeted an article that, it transpired, was three years old. Oopsie!

In my defense, though, it was about a law in Oklahoma that was really, really heinous and had actually passed, so my brain was a bit addled. This law (later struck down by the courts) would have required that the details of every abortion conducted in the state be posted on a public website:

The questionnaire doesn’t include the woman’s name or “any information specifically identifying the patient,” but it does ask for age, race, level of education, marital status, number of previous pregnancies, and the county in which the abortion was performed, information which opponents of the bill argue would be enough to identify a woman in a small town. The questionnaire also asks about the mother’s reason for the abortion, her method of payment, and even what type of insurance she has, as well as whether the fetus received anaesthetic and whether there was “an infant born alive as a result of the abortion.”

So, you know – phew! At least we dodged that one!

Except we didn’t.

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Burying The Needle On The White Privilege-O-Meter

No madam, you don’t get to laugh this off.

So the woman behind the awful anti-Obama bumper sticker that reads “Don’t Re-Nig 2012″ has decided that it’s not racist because she says so. It’s the other several million of you who are wrong, so LOL case closed. Forbes’ Roger Friedman investigates:

Exclusive: Paula Smith of Hinesville, Georgia has a company called Stickatude.com. And they’re selling their own version of an anti-Obama bumper sticker that reads “Don’t Re-Nig 2012.” Ms. Smith told me in a telephone conversation on Saturday afternoon that the bumper sticker has been in their inventory since June 2010, but just in the last few days it’s started selling. The price is $3. Ms. Smith insisted that  the bumper sticker is not racist. I asked her about the “N” word, for which “nig” is the shortened version. “According to the dictionary [the N word] does not mean black. It means a low down, lazy, sorry, low down person. That’s what the N word means.”

OK then, well since you’ve decided that the N-word is no longer racist, I’ve decided that you’re pretty much an awful excuse for a human being.  That was easy.

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Dear GOP: You do know how pregnancy works, right?

I have been pregnant four times.

These pregnancies led to the following four results, in this order: abortion, baby, miscarriage, baby.

These pregnancies occurred over a span of many years, across two continents, and in three different homes. There were at least seven different health care professionals involved, my hair styles varied widely, as did my levels of nausea. The only constant, in all four cases, other than me, was the presence of a penis.

It happened to be the penis I eventually married, but regardless, that is how pregnancy works. No matter who you are, no matter your sexuality, ability to reproduce, or family make-up, if there are children in your life, at some point along the way, there was a penis involved.

I mention this only because it seems the GOP may have forgotten.

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