I am lolling out loud.
Frothman is melting under the spotlight, and it’s kind of a mess. Let’s rundown this story.
January 1: Santorum discusses food stamps in Iowa: “I do not want to make black people’s lives better by giving them sombeody else’s money, I want to give them the opportunity to go out and earn the money.”
January 5: Santorum appears on Fox News and pleads his case to Bill O’Reilly: “I didn’t say black people, I said blah people.”
Later on January 5: Millions laugh at Santorum. A meme is born.
January 6: A debate rages on the left (it doesn’t really “rage” per se, but, you know — whatever). Did he say black people? Blah people? Mbligh people? Was it a slip of the tongue? Does anyone really care? I plant my flag on the “don’t really care” hillside of the debate.
January 7: I change my Twitter handle to AngryBlahLady for a couple days.
That brings us to today –
January 9: I’m back to being @AngryBlackLady on the Twitters and Rick Santorum is back to tone-deafness incarnate. (Well, “remains” actually, because when has Rick “It’s better that a child be raised by a dude in prison than by two mommies“** Santorum ever stopped being unabashedly tone-deaf?)
Now, apparently, Rick is going with “plives.” As in he screwed up when he tried to say “people’s lives.”
Ok fine. Whatever. He can pick a gibberish word and hang his hat on it. I don’t care. But for the love of blog, can someone tell him to please stop being such a clueless white dude? It’s getting ridiculous.
Rick Santorum just can’t stop digging:
“Oh that’s just absurd,” he said testily, as a mob of reporters surrounded him.
“First off, I didn’t say the word black. I got my tongue tied. You guys are making — look at my track record, look at what I’ve done for opportunity and helping people. Look at my record of employment, look at my record of working in the community. You guys, you guys — it’s really sad that you are bringing this up. It’s just sad news. I’ve done more in the African-American communities as a Republican than any Republican in recent memory.”
Dude, naw.
Listen up: When your “Yo bro! I’m aight” claim is that you’ve done more in black communities “as a Republican” than any Republican in recent memory, then you’re in baaaaaaad shape. Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaad.
By what standard are we to measure your record of “doing things” for black folks’?
I mean, do I have to bring up what George Bush did for black people during Katrina? Because I will!
Ok, sure, Rick — when compared to Bush, I guess we should be thankful that you haven’t let any Negroes drown lately.***
~confetti~
**Oh yeah, he went there.
*** Oh yeah, I went there.
[via New York Times]
I think he actually said “to blave”. #PrincessBride
OUTSTANDING.
I can’t believe I didn’t make that joke. HA!
Please, accept this Internet. I would offer to name my firstborn after you, but my husband might object.
I want to write something about how utterly ignorant and self-important Santorum is, but I can’t… I can’t keep up with him. Just about the time I think I’ve got a bead on him, he goes further down the track to Crazy Town. I guess now that Bachmann is out, he’s the designated loose cannon.
“Plives”? What the fuck does that even mean? I mean, what does he mean that he said? “Blah plives”? “Black plives”? What does he mean that he meant to say? I can’t follow this shit at all. But it means nothing, after all. I know what he meant. He knows what he meant. I think we all know what he meant.
And this leads me to yet something else I don’t understand about conservatives: Why do they keep on telling us they didn’t say what they said? Who do they think is going to believe this? I mean, the only people who will even say that they believe this shit are the pinheads who were going to vote for Santorum even if he did say he didn’t want to help black people by giving (read: stealing) other people’s (read: white people’s) money.
It’s like the guy you see with the wig that’s so bad it looks like he scraped it off the side of the highway. Dude, you know you’re bald; we know you’re bald. Lose the steel-wool wig and be one with your baldness already. And to Santorum: Dude, you know you’re an asshole; we know you’re an asshole. Lose the lame-O crap excuses and be one with your sphinctericity already.
Well, yeah, if by doing things for black people he means holding their children down so Sandusky could rape them…
http://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2011/11/rick-santorum-sponsored-honor-for-accused-psu-coach-jerry-sandusky/248234/
He actually said “SPLUNGE!” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3v0I4OQi7CQ
I thought he said SPORK!!
Well, if there was any doubt remaining anywhere at all that Charles Fucking Krauthammer is a complete idiot (as well as a raving lunatic asshole) we need only point to this:
http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/opinion/ct-oped-0109-krauthammer-20120108-15,0,3923996.column
The mind reels.
No, fuck that. The mind projectile vomits.
I saw that. Krauthammer is one guy I just don’t get. The guy’s a psychiatrist. He went to Harvard Medical School, so he must have some brains. And yet he churns out this pathetic shit week after week. I’d have thought that a guy of his standing and brains would have enough self respect that he wouldn’t be willing to lie like this for a living, especially for the benefit of a party so hollow and sociopathic as the Republicans, but he keeps on doing it. I really wonder how he can live with himself.
And I meant to point out this gem specifically:
“He is the first challenger to be plausibly presidential: knowledgeable, articulate, experienced, of stable character and authentic ideology.”
This guy, Santorum, is of such “stable character” and “authentic ideology” that he helped Tom DeLay set up a blissful island paradise in the Northern Mariana Trust Territories where young women, lured there by promises of good jobs from China, had to put up with their violent, exploitative bosses raping them. Then when they got pregnant, the bosses forced them to have abortions. Santorum is such a serious pro life douchebag that he helped tin-pot tycoons force their workers to have abortions. There’s no way Krauthammer can non know that, and he still kisses his ass.
I am just happy that the rest of the nation is now being subjected to what I was subjected to every day for the twelve years that this asswipe was my senator. Ask anyone from Penn Hills (where he was registered to vote but only had an empty, abandoned 2br home there). They had to pay over a hundred grand to this jerk for his kids “cyber charter” school as his wife homeschooled them in their mansion in Virginia. Not even evangelicals or Republicans in Penn Hills would cross the street to spit on him, let alone vote for him.
Hi ABL. I’ve been on vacation and just now caught up on the big GG shitstorm on BJ. Sorry you had to experience that bullshit, and I never have been able to understand Cole’s devotion to the guy. It actually is kind of creepy, and has been been for a long while, or since Glenn decided he was going to create the storyboard that Obama is worse than Bush. I think it comes from Cole’s angst over having voting and supporting Bush, or some such.
thanks stuck. :)
@General Stuck
I am so happy to “see” you hear. I stopped going to BJ but you were one of the people I was missing.
Awwe. thank you MomSense. I hope to limit my commenting on BJ. as there are still some folks on that blog I am partial to interacting with, but those numbers are dwindling every day with the site becoming more a cesspool of mean spirited hate trolls, with each passing day/
“Plives.”
Maybe he meant “piles?”
Admittedly, it wouldn’t improve things any.
what? what’s everybody on about? he said he doesn’t want ‘to make blah people’s plives better’, and why should he? everyone knows that blah people’s plives are just fine the way they are, without any interference from the government.
next it will be ‘blah people’s plives butter’, and then ‘blah puppies’ plives butter’. eventually he will say he said, ‘wah wah wah wawww waw waw’, like charlie brown’s teacher.
BWAHAAHAAHAA!!! (SNORT!)
Nice.
WIN.
Rick Santorum, the Amazing Garglemesh. I suppose when you define “shouting ‘get a job’ at someone who has a job” as doing something, then man, he’s done amazing amounts for black people. Blah people. Blahpl. Rick Santorum has done more for blapple than anyone else in the world; now we just have to work out what blapple is.
Now, hunt down some gay blapple, Rick Santorum has helped those people more than anyone else in the history of human existence.
I mean, obviously I can see all the flagrant lying and stupid interpretations, they’re right out there. But I’m also seeing him doing a frantic splashing around to define his terms in his own disturbingly smooth and oval-shaped head while he answers the question. It’s all a “certain point of view” with him; I’m just waiting for Mitt Romney to (metaphorically) cut him down in the primaries so that he can appear to Rick Perry as a hugely annoying Force ghost out to badger the gays and tell him no, he said Darth Vader killed yo fasher. Also that when he kissed his sister, that was nearly as bad as monogamous gays pledging their love to one another.
(None of this is anywhere near as good as “to blave”; I understand this. Sometimes you have to accept that the post was won in the first comment.)