I just read an article over at Politicususa that was so WTF!?-inducing, that I put a record on just so I could make it scratch — skr-r-r-reeek!! — after which, I slapped myself, did a double take, rubbed my eyes with closed fists, did a shot of whisky, and then read it again.
That’s how absurd what you’re about to read is.
But first, let me back up.
A couple weeks ago, Michele Bachmann signed a Families Values Are Awesome and Homosexuality Will Kill Your Children pledge, which noted that while slavery was, like, totally the worst, at least little black childrenses had two parents back then.
The “slavery preamble” to the Conservative Nutbag Pledge read as follows:
“Slavery had a disastrous impact on African-American families, yet sadly a child born into slavery in 1860 was more likely to be raised by his mother and father in a two-parent household than was an African-American baby born after the election of the USA?s first African-American President,”
Needless to say, that didn’t go over too well; the odious clause was removed from the pledge, and Bachmann made some silly claim that she hadn’t actually read the slavery preamble (even though it was the first damn clause in the pledge, hence the term “preamble”).
But never mind that. Point is, the conservative nutbags realized that it is absolutely inappropriate for a white person to laud the virtues of black family life under slavery.
It’s much better if you get a black person to do it.
Enter Star Parker, right-wing nutjob and religious whackadoodle — who obviously has a deep-fried sneaker where her brain should be — to confirm what white folks have been saying all along, which is that black families arguably were healthier under slavery than they are today.
Parker, who said recently that “too many Blacks do not want to be free” (what, they yearn for slavery?) endorses the claim that black families, while not being allowed to have families because they weren’t allowed to marry, were somehow better off under slavery.
No. Just no.
What is with the sudden proliferation of nutty-ass black folks spouting nutty-ass theories? On Sunday, at the South Central Tea Party rally, I had a close encounter with nutbaggery as I listened to Reverend Jesse Lee Peterson preach his special brand of Crazy. (I wrote about it over at TheGrio.com: “Black reverend preaches stereotypes to mostly white ‘South Central’ Tea Partiers“.)
Did you know that during the civil rights movement, black folks made a bargain with the NAACP — remove the father from the home in exchange for some supersweet government benevolence? You didn’t know that? Well, that’s the gospel of Reverend Jesse Lee:
“The NAACP is no different than the KKK hat the KKK hung black Americans up by their physical bodies, but the NAACP steals their hearts and minds and souls, and they kill black Americans by making black Americans or causing black Americans to hate their country, to hate what’s right, to depend on the government rather than depending on themselves.
50 years ago, starting with the civil rights movement, they came in and said to black Americans that you’re being discriminated against, this country’s against you, but we’re going to help you… you need the government; the government’s going to help you, but you can’t have a father in the home, and so black Americans said yes to that, and they took the fathers out of the homes and the government became the daddy of the families…”
These Negros have lost their damn minds. You have to be one ignorant, brainwashed, or opportunistic individual to believe this nonsense, or to go on a rightwing talk show (American Family Radio’s Today’s Issues with Tony Perkins of the Family Research Council and Tom Wildmon of the American Family Association) and propogate this nonsense.
Quite simply, It’s utter bullshit.
Hrafnkell Haraldsson over at Politicususa nails it:
We don’t have data on what a black family looked like during slavery? Really? Here’s the answer for you Star: We don’t have data because slaves were not allowed to have families. Is that good enough for you? How can something that can’t exist be more intact than something that can?
The simple fact is that today, free of slavery, blacks are free to marry and have families. The simple fact is that during the slave era, this was not true. It’s really very simple.
It’s amazing logic: we’re being told by conservatives that liberalism has enslaved blacks, that Democrats are racists. But if blacks were better off under slavery, wouldn’t this logic lead to the obvious conclusion that Democrats have actually helped blacks by re-enslaving them?
It’s remarkable that someone could push this narrative and not fear being accused of catastrophic levels of ignorance; more remarkable still is thinking you are going to garner black votes for your causes. It’s not going to matter that the speaker herself is black. It’s rather like a Jew arguing that Jews were better off under Hitler or a Native American arguing that Native Americans were better off on the reservations than living free on the prairies and in the forests, or that like a Heathen saying “Boy, we’re sure glad the Christians took away our religion and our culture from us!”
As a friend of ours said in response to this news:
Jesus take the wheel. And bash that crazy lady with said wheel.